Tough Love: How Parents Can Deal with Drug Abuse

Having a child addicted to alcohol or drugs is one of the most heartbreaking and challenging problems that parents may face. Here, in a revision of her bestselling 1982 book, Neff offers practical, loving and completely updated help to those struggling with that situation. Although the specific 12-step program that Neff stresses does not exist everywhere, parents can adopt the principles she outlines and form support groups with other parents. Central to Neff's approach is "detachment from the abuser," which entails allowing the abuser to "bottom out" without "padding the corners" (often called "enabling" in other references). This method, argues Neff, provides one of the few hopes for the abuser and his or her family. It is also terrifying, however, to parents who lack the support and distancing of the tough-love approach. By far the largest part of Neff's book is devoted to the stories of seven families who have faced the crisis of the addicted child and come through it stronger and more spiritually intact. In short, this book should be required reading for every parent with a child in trouble.
Copyright 1996 Reed Business Information, Inc.

Tough Love is hope. It is help. It is a way of recovery for drug abusers, and a positive, supportive program for their families. Tough Love is a gift of love and a gift of life for those who practice its plan. It is a book for all parents, especially those whose children are now on drugs or are exposed to those who use drugs. Pauline Neff has gathered enthralling, real-life accounts of young drug users who needed help and of their parents' role in seeing that they received it. Eight families describe, in very graphic, heartrending terms, how their children successfully beat the drug habit through The Palmer Drug Abuse Program. PDAP is a privately financed twelve-step program, similar to the steps of AA. Ms. Neff explains each step to show how families can interpret and work through these steps in their own lives. Thousands of young people have found help through this method. Families have been reunited, and parents' own lives have been changed drastically in the process. If you are a parent of a young person in America today, Tough Love may be the most important book you will ever read. It may save your life.